Life is nuts isn't it? And we all know that it never really calms down - the challenges simply change. School's out. Yay!! (No - that's not me talking, that's my kids). My two youngest are fighting like the world might end tomorrow and they need to let each other know how annoying and despicable the other one thinks they are. The toddler manhandles Preston's Lego car and Preston throws it in anger yelling that the toddler ruined it - and not just the Lego car - his LIFE! "This is the worst day of my life!" Sigh. I suggest a simple and relaxing game of Candy Land. They show up to the game table with their best of poker faces and they are not going to let anyone or anything steal away their chance at sweet victory. Accusations of cheating and board-manipulation fly, all the while the toddler simply moves his piece from one spot to the next which is simply just too much to take for the real players. The game is over and nobody is ever playing again.
My mind starts racing to find the magical activity that will calm troubled souls while the boys brood in their rooms. I come up with getting them out of the house and taking them to a museum. It couldn't be more perfect! Apparently I picked the 'come out of the house and play in a public area with the worst cough you've ever had' day. Kids are hacking all over the place and the air is thick with viral microbes and hidden guilt from mother's being 'that' parent that brought their kid out of seclusion to infect everyone else. There is screaming and running and shoving and kids in their diapers sliding down the slide and bum-scooting their way across the play area where the rest of the kids have planted their faces and are licking the carpet because for some reason, kids just like laying down in the grossest area possible (airport or grocery store floors anyone?). I can only watch-on in abject horror; to terrified to move in.
And this is just the first day - I try to not to go into shock and somewhere deep inside muster up my inner-Superwoman. Deep breath in, deep breath out - pot on the stove boiling. Another deep breath in, deep breath out - toddler hits head on coffee table while wrestling with big brother - crying and finger-pointing ensue. Deep breath in - "Mom! I'm bored! This is the worst day of my life!" Deep breath out.
So, since I can't seem to change the fact that my two youngest are currently mortal enemies and my moody teenager continues to be, well, moody, I have to figure this out some other way. I'm always preaching about taking charge of yourself because it is the only person you can control, so I'm getting my head back in the game and doing just that. I'm not beating myself up because 1) anger and yelling only escalate the issues 2) I don't give in to my toddler's tantrums and he is consequenced for naughty behavior 3) I teach and train knowing they still have their own personalities and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting and 3) I'm an imperfect gal and I'm doing the best I can with the knowledge I have.
Here is a little tidbit for you to help you stay relaxed and flexible; I received a great email yesterday based on the wit and wisdom of Mayou Angelou. I loved it and I'm sharing it with you in hopes that will help re-vamp your perspective as it did mine. I'm also recommending Louise Hay if you need a jump start in positive affirmations and simply changing your mindset - create what you want. Employ, enjoy and good luck mommies!
Mayou Angelou on life lessons:
My mind starts racing to find the magical activity that will calm troubled souls while the boys brood in their rooms. I come up with getting them out of the house and taking them to a museum. It couldn't be more perfect! Apparently I picked the 'come out of the house and play in a public area with the worst cough you've ever had' day. Kids are hacking all over the place and the air is thick with viral microbes and hidden guilt from mother's being 'that' parent that brought their kid out of seclusion to infect everyone else. There is screaming and running and shoving and kids in their diapers sliding down the slide and bum-scooting their way across the play area where the rest of the kids have planted their faces and are licking the carpet because for some reason, kids just like laying down in the grossest area possible (airport or grocery store floors anyone?). I can only watch-on in abject horror; to terrified to move in.
And this is just the first day - I try to not to go into shock and somewhere deep inside muster up my inner-Superwoman. Deep breath in, deep breath out - pot on the stove boiling. Another deep breath in, deep breath out - toddler hits head on coffee table while wrestling with big brother - crying and finger-pointing ensue. Deep breath in - "Mom! I'm bored! This is the worst day of my life!" Deep breath out.
So, since I can't seem to change the fact that my two youngest are currently mortal enemies and my moody teenager continues to be, well, moody, I have to figure this out some other way. I'm always preaching about taking charge of yourself because it is the only person you can control, so I'm getting my head back in the game and doing just that. I'm not beating myself up because 1) anger and yelling only escalate the issues 2) I don't give in to my toddler's tantrums and he is consequenced for naughty behavior 3) I teach and train knowing they still have their own personalities and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting and 3) I'm an imperfect gal and I'm doing the best I can with the knowledge I have.
Here is a little tidbit for you to help you stay relaxed and flexible; I received a great email yesterday based on the wit and wisdom of Mayou Angelou. I loved it and I'm sharing it with you in hopes that will help re-vamp your perspective as it did mine. I'm also recommending Louise Hay if you need a jump start in positive affirmations and simply changing your mindset - create what you want. Employ, enjoy and good luck mommies!
Mayou Angelou on life lessons:
I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it
seems today, life does go on and it will be better tomorrow.
I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the
way they handle these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas
tree lights.
I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your
parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life.
I’ve learned that making a ‘living’ is not the same thing as
‘making a life.’
I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance
(I’ll amend that though and say that it rarely doesn’t give second chances. You
can change at any moment.)
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a
catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw some things back.’
I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open
heart, I usually make the right decision.
I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be
one.
I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch
someone. People love a warm hug or just a friendly pat on the back.
I’ve learned that I will always have something new to learn.
I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people
will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
This is such a riot! I got a couple of good belly laughs out of it! Oh the drama of it all. It would be easier to just tie them to a tree and hose them down! ha! Keep yer chin up!!!
ReplyDeleteDrama? My kids? Never! I'm sure that most people think I'm kidding about the day I described above but it really does happen just like that. From the "This is the worst day of my life!" down to the bum-scooters at popular play museums. I'm practicing my laughing-in-the-face-frustration skills and the 'mom's-dead-on-the-couch-with-the-arm-dangling-over-the-side-ploy.'
DeleteMy daughter who has two young boys has a solution. A velcro wall. Put a body suit on your kids that will stick to a velcro wall in your home, then you can shower, talk on the phone, catch your breath. The list could go on and on!!!
ReplyDeleteMary Fetzer
That is hilarious! And sadly, a little too tempting!
DeleteYou are an incredible woman, and a good Mother. How about a little music therapy? Head over to iTunes and make a playlist of composers from the Impressionistic period: Ravel and Debussy are my favorites for calming down. Maybe some unnoticed background music will solve some angst for everyone. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteOh my dear Lana - I try to be a good mom and woman and sometimes things work but most of the time I'm at the proverbial drawing board that I never really have to 'go back to' because I don't really ever leave! Thanks for the suggestion though - I forget the power of music so often and it really can have such a calming affect! Love you!!
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