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I Can Only Change ME

I CAN ONLY CHANGE ME

Welcome my friend! I have taken some time-off (well, a lot of time off) but the break - and long awaited return - is over! And I figured there was no better way to jump back in to this than to re-state what the whole purpose of this blog is. (Are blogs on the out now? Do I need a .com address to be 'legit?' Well, whatever, this is where I'm startin'!) The crazy part is, over the years, this ONE key concept - I CAN ONLY CHANGE ME - is what I keep coming back to and what my ultimate fallback is. I may be a slow learner folks, but I'll probably never get it. Yes - that is not a typo - I probably will  never master this, but I sure can work at it every day! As I say that, I realize I need to offer my kids and my husband way more grace and forgiveness than I do because I am myself am a repeat offender in all things bad and luckily all things good as well.

This right here is the foundation to this whole blog: You can't change anyone but yourself! As corny as it is, that is the secret in the sauce. BE YOU - everyone else is taken! I had a good friend say to me recently, "God created you to be different. Don't do what everyone else is doing." You are the only you out there and start believing that you are fabulous! But really folks, we get married and try to change our spouse. We have kids and try to change our kids. The best way to bring about change is to yes, be the change; be the example and always be a work in progress. It is about progress, not perfection. It will never be about perfection because it is unattainable! So get used to rejection, to failure, to disappointment and to change and learn to embrace it to learn from it, grown from it and evolve.

This is the one time I will tell you that it really is all about you. Everything you do in life, will start with you. How wonderful and horrible at the same time! How I react to the good and the bad will either lend to my wisdom or lead to my undoing and will certainly have an unprecedented affect on those around me. For this reason, I must always come first - to love, to take care of, to master. Learn to always look to yourself for what is happening in your life. Practice the art of taking accountability and stop blaming other people or circumstances for what may come your way. I'm pretty sure I will be working on this for the rest of my life, but it will be the quickest path to where ever it is you are going.




I've learned this secret the hard way through personal experience. As a divorcee, mother to a child with ADHD and ODD; step-parent in a blended family and as an ordinary gal trying to make it all work, I know that true happiness will only come from me; it is not dependent on anyone or anything.

Happiness is a choice, not some destination that we will arrive at when everything in life magically falls into place. Nothing worthwhile is easy and nothing easy is worthwhile; every single day of our life will take effort and self-mastery. It isn't meant to come freely or easily or without bumps in the road. I love this guy, more than anything! But sometimes I wanna smack him upside the head with a rolled-up magazine - he drives me absolutely nuts! Sometimes we bicker, we see things differently and I think mean thoughts about him in my head that he doesn't know about (sorry babe). But, I work everyday to forgive quickly and even quicker I remind myself that I am just as much of a stinker, sometimes.

"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time, accepting hardships as the pathway to peace."

Life is about you and your journey.

Live your life intentionally. Answer without hesitation for what you do and who you are. Set time aside to do what you love - it will keep you happy and enable you to share more love and be a light to others. Your abilities as a wife, mother, sister, friend (and men, this does go for you as well - husband, father, brother, friend) expand exponentially when you are good with you and that requires finding your personally balanced, happy place.




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